The diagram below, describes how to meet women online, from one end of the spectrum to the other. This isn’t all of them, but these are the main ones.
Tinder, Hinge, Happn>>>>>OK Cupid, Plenty Of Fish, Coffee Meets Bagel>>>>>>Match.com, E-Harmony.
What do I mean by the spectrum? To get the most out of your time spent on these sites, you need to take different approaches (meaning towards your profile, profile pictures, messages sent, and just overall vibe) to the sites on each part of this little diagram.
In this article, I will be focusing on the left side of the spectrum or, how to meet women online for free: Tinder, Hinge, and Happn.
Tinder is an interesting App. For those that don’t know, yes I did say app, meaning you only download it to your phone or mobile device. This is the least intimate form of online dating. If you are serious about finding a girlfriend from online dating, I would probably focus more on the middle or right side of diagram above.
If on the other hand, you are interested in how to meet women online for just casual dating, then Tinder might serve you better. Tinder tends to have more attractive women on it because hotter women (say 9’s and 10’s, or model types), usually don’t like having to admit that they can’t find a man normally and have to go online to do so.
Tinder is also a more commonly used app by more attractive women because it has the feel of a playful social media app like Snapchat or even Instagram. Do not get your hopes up and make the mistake of thinking that women use Tinder only because they want to hook up or immediately meet up with you for sex. Although you might run into a girl like that on here, for the most part it’s not the norm, no matter what any guy tells you.
If a guy you know says he uses Tinder and meets/has sex with multiple girls a week, he’s not doing that based off of just a few quick messages.
He’s sending the right type of playful/fun messages to her, getting the phone number, most likely calling, and meeting up with her somewhere first.
Make no mistake, in the world of online dating, looks do matter and if a girl swipes left to you, you’re done. So having the right profile picture is crucial to success.
NEVER, and I do mean NEVER… put a picture of yourself up where you’re taking a mirror selfie and/or posing with your shirt off.
I can’t even count how many girls I’ve talked to that have told me they can’t stand this.
On Tinder, or Hinge specifically, photos that have the following elements should be used:
1.) If you aren’t naturally good looking, pictures with you wearing nice clothing will go a long way. This is especially true if you have a photo of yourself in a nice suit or a sports jacket. Consider having professional photos taken of yourself like headshots for example.
2.) Have a photo of yourself with an attractive girl, or a couple girls (Bonus if you’re doing something fun/adventurous with them). This will show pre-selection, that you some degree of self confidence with women, and lets girls know that other women like you.
3.) If you are in good shape, you’ll want to play up this strength and get a shirtless picture in there. However, ideally of you doing something physical or playing a sport. Personally I have a shirtless one of myself on the beach and am smiling into the camera. The difference here is that I don’t look like I’m TRYING to pose, or that I’m stuck on myself. I look like I just stopped and pivoted because someone wanted to snap a quick picture of me. You want to play up your strengths, but in an accidental way.
On Tinder, it’s best to keep it at 3 photos, 4 max. It only takes one photo for her to dislike and then she’s done with you.
Keep your profile sentence brief but interesting. Girls on Tinder are more receptive than OK Cupid or especially Match.com to an edgier, more arrogant, almost offensive headline.
Here are a couple examples:
”If you’re not into health and fitness, NEXT!! Sorry, not sorry.”
You could replace ”health and fitness” here with anything.
”If you’re dumb, don’t bother swiping right. If you’re overweight, drop the fork and get lost. If you’re hot, cool, and alive, lets talk.”
Credit for that one go’s to Todd Valentine from Real Social Dynamics by the way.
FIRST MESSAGE EXAMPLES (Taken from my actual message exchanges):
Me: ”Tinder says we would make beautiful babies, how about a drink before we work on the future models of America?”
Her: ”I have to agree though”
”We can practice this whole baby making thing if you want”
Me: ”Glad you agree, but let’s take it one step at a time, here’s my number… what’s yours?”
Her: ”I hope I’m not disappointed… ”
Me: ”Hmm… the cute ones usually end up being bots. I’ll see how you respond before bringing my A game:-P”
Her: ”I’m as real as they come”
Me: ”Cool, if you’re just looking to hookup, brace yourself for 30 seconds of disappointment”
”Followed by 10 minutes of apologies and excuses”
Her: ”What if I’m not”
Me: ”Then maybe we can hang out!”
”How was your New Years?”
Her: ”Pretty boring haha how about you?”
Me: ”It was pretty exciting actually, here’s my number… , what’s yours? I don’t like talking on this app”
Her: ”218-… -… ”
Me: ”Hey little instigator;)”
Her: ”Whatever makes you think I’m an instigator? Not far off though;)”
Me: ”Hopefully you are so you can keep me from getting bored with you”
Her: ”So what’s your story… and this issue with… (question pertaining to the profile I had).
Me: ”No issue, and my story is a bit long and better discussed over a drink.”
Her: ”I can oblige. I like drinks and stories… As long as they’re good.”
Me: ”Good! I only have good ones, whereabouts are you? I’m in Dallas”
Her: ”I’m in Dallas basically near North Park Mall”
Me: ”Badass, here’s my number:… , what’s yours?”
Her: ”It’s… ”
Me: ”Cool, I’ll give you a shout tomorrow”
Me: ”Jennifer, will you marry me?”
Her: ”Lol. You’re funny.”
Me: ”Come on! Take a chance;)”
Her: ”Lol. I should just give true lust… I mean love a chance?”
Me: ”Lol, glad you have a sense of humor, of course:) what’s your number, we can talk more about wedding arrangements.”
Her: ”Lol it’s… ”
On Tinder (Hinge or Happn), if you put in the time, really work it diligently everyday, it’s perfectly reasonable to be go on 1-3 dates A DAY. 1 hour a day of messaging girls is considered diligent. This will also involve calling girls and working towards constantly setting up dates, so add in another 15-30 minutes of phone time at night. After 3-4 weeks of this, your pipeline should be pretty healthy.